In Theaters: April 28, 2017

There are TWO new wide releases this weekend.

The Circle

It was right around the summer of 2013 that Edward Snowden blew the whistle on the CIA and the surveillance state.  By that time Captain America: The Winter Soldier was well into production.  It was a happy accident that The Winter Soldier was infused with up-to-the-minute social commentary on the surveillance state.  Since then, every movie that includes major themes of surveillance just feels late to the party, irrelevant, or outdated (with the exception of Snowden, for obvious reasons).  The Circle is the latest of these movies.

In this movie, Tom Hanks is a cross between Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg, and apparently Big Brother.  His tech company, The Circle, is really into surveillance - although "knowledge" is the preferred term.  I can't tell you if their product is an app, a device, or both, but whatever it is it makes Emma Watson's character more uncomfortable the more she learns about it.  She plays a new hire at The Circle that makes a big splash.

Also, Emma Watson's character is dating (married to?) this guy:

So yeah.  That's about six hundred points lost for lack of realism.

The Circle is rated PG-13 for a sexual situation, brief strong language and some thematic elements including drug use.

How to be a Latin Lover

Okay Stick with me for a sec, because the basic idea of this movie is actually kinda funny.

Eugenio Derbez plays Maximo, a Latin gold digger who has been married to an extravagantly wealthy older white woman for twenty-five years when she drops him for another man.  Displaced with no life skills, he moves in with his sister (Selma Hayek) and nephew.  When he discovers that his nephew needs advice with girls, and that the girl his nephew is after has a wealthy single mother, they set out to conquer mother and daughter.  I would genuinely expect a lot of really good gags from this one.

How to be a Latin Lover is rated PG-13 for crude humor, sexual references and gestures, and for brief nudity.

      Big Shot Critic

In Theaters: April 21, 2017

There are a whopping FIVE wide releases hitting theaters this weekend.

Born in China

Disneynature is Disney's documentary banner, and every year they produce a documentary and release it on or near Earth Day.  I think it's actually a pretty cool tradition that they've started.  I kinda like documentaries, although I have never seen a Disneynature documentary.

This year we have Born in China.  You guessed it.  It follows animals born in China.  Three in particular, I believe: the panda bear pictured in the poster, a snow leopard looking thing, and something else - a monkey I think.  This film is narrated by John Krasinski (who was most definitely born in Boston) and count on it to rely heavily on the cute animal factor.

Born in China is rated G.  That's it, no reason offered.  Just G.

Free Fire

Okay.  An arms deal, somewhere in England by the looks of it, goes bad.  And that's it.  That is literally the whole movie.  And I don't mean they chase each other around England or Europe for a few days, I mean the whole movie takes place in the very building where the deal goes bad.  I can only assume the time period the movie covers is little more than two hours real time.

This is a very strange looking movie.

Free Fire is rated R for strong violence, pervasive language, sexual references and drug use.

Phoenix Forgotten

The latest in a VERY long line of absolute trash found footage horror films.

This movie is about three young people who supposedly ventured out into the desert after the UFO sightings over Phoenix in 1997.  And then of course they disappeared, but managed to film many scary things before probably dying.  Because that's exactly how all of these movies go.

Pro tip: if there's a hashtag on the poster almost as big as the title don't see the movie.  Nothing about this movie screams second rate.  No, it all screams third rate.  When you put "from the producers of/writers of/creative team behind" on your poster, it should be referencing movies of the same genre.  This one mentions The Martian (drama), 300 (stylized action), and The Maze Runner (YA adaptation).  It couldn't be more obvious that they are grabbing for something that sticks.

On a personal note, I am native to the Phoenix area, and I really hate it when the most recent pop culture reference to my home is garbage like this.

Phoenix Forgotten is rated PG-13 for terror, peril and some language.

The Promise

From the director of Hotel Rwanda, who apparently can only make films about genocide, comes The Promise!

I don't know the history of Armenia and Turkey or the Ottoman Empire, but it all looks REALLY dramatic from the trailer, let me tell you.  I also don't know what promise it is to which the title refers.

After some reading all I can tell you is that during and after the first world war the Ottoman Empire (which became Turkey) carried out a massive relocation/genocide of Armenians.  Some were killed, some were forcibly relocated, and all those forcibly relocated were marched under terrible conditions (think trail of tears, but with Armenians) and abused regularly - often resulting in death.  So this movie has this epic backdrop war drama love story thing going on.

The Promise is rated PG-13 for thematic material including war atrocities, violence and disturbing images, and for some sexuality.

Unforgettable

Hey look, everyone!  Katherine Heigl still exists!

It's a stalker thriller.  And from the poster I think you can tell who the stalker is.  Basically Katherine Heigl is very unhappy that Rosario Dawson has married her ex.  Or is engaged to her ex.  Or something.  Whatever.

Unforgettable is kinda sorta destined to be #phoenixforgotten in my opinion.  SEE WHAT I DID THERE??

Unforgettable is rated R for sexual content, violence, some language, and brief partial nudity.

PHEW!  Okay, kids, that's all five for this week!  I bet Fate of the Furious holds onto the number one spot without a problem.

      Big Shot Critic

In Theaters: April 14, 2017

There can be only ONE!

The Fate of the Furious

It's time to play the music.  It's time to light the lights.  It's time for another Fast & Furious movie.

It's the franchise that will only go onward and upward in spite of everyone pretending it's below them.  This is not only one of the most successful franchises today, it is by far the most necessary Hollywood franchise we have.  It is precious.  The perfect foil for the current model of mid-credits and post-credits nonsense.  I could go on but I wrote a whole editorial about this in 2014 and you can read that instead.

In this eighth installment, the family faces its toughest challenge yet - the apparent betrayal of their fearless leader, Dominic Toretto.

The real question on everyone's mind is if this franchise can survive without Paul Walker.  Thematically, this movie is taking that question head on by having the team go through a similar loss and see if they can find their way through it.  My personal theory is that this franchise will not only survive, but thrive.

The Fate of the Furious is rated PG-13 for prolonged sequences of violence and destruction, suggestive content, and language.

And that's it!  No movie was man enough to go head to head with this one this weekend.  It will conquer all.

      Big Shot Critic

In Theaters: April 7, 2017

There are THREE wide releases this weekend.

The Case for Christ

The fact is that these faith-based films get the same amount of press attention (in the mainstream outlets) as a movie like Geostorm.  You've probably not heard of Geostorm, so now you see what I mean.

What I'm getting at here is that all I know about this movie is from the trailer I just watched.  An atheist (agnostic?) journalist marries a Christian woman and doesn't believe - no fuss there.  But then I think she dies.  At least it looked like a funeral scene in the trailer.  So he goes and pulls all his journalism powers to bear to build the case for Christ, as it were.  And it's either based in the 70's or in a region of the country with very backward taste in fashion.

In terms of quality, these faith-based films are hit and miss.  Mostly miss, I'm sorry to say.  But there has been a steady and noticeable uptick in the overall delivery of faith-based films in the last five years or so.

The Case for Christ is rated PG for thematic elements including medical descriptions of crucifixion (yikes!), and incidental smoking.

Going in Style

Capitalism is the bad guy.  At this point it's just like, "Oh, please."

Going in Style is an old-person heist film.  Something to do with losing their pensions because of a corporate takeover or whatever.  It's a comedy, you get the idea.

Going in Style is rated PG-13 for drug content, language and some suggestive material.

Smurfs: The Lost Village

It's the third one!  I'm pretty sure.

Smurfs: The Lost Village is a Smurfs movie where they discover a lost village.

I bet there will be quite a few funny gags in this one, but perhaps not enough to counterbalance the doubtlessly large number of unfunny gags.

Smurfs: The Lost Village is rated PG for some mild action and rude humor.

      Big Shot Critic